Stakes' Birthdays
by KingsJester
Summary: A collection of one-shots featuring the happpy times of the cute nee-chans


Chapter 1

**Red text is written in bold**

_Blue text is written in italics_

Ordinarily, the birthdays of demons are to be quiet, mature gatherings of close friends and families; perhaps the occasional human sacrifice for the more peckish guests, or the antics of some of the younger, more rowdy magicians. Surely though, these times are small jewels of good-will and peace, for demons of course.

"BATTLER-SAMA!!!" yelled Beelzebub of Gluttony. Ordinarily, she was quiet and content with food. However, today was a special day for her.

"Owowowowow, what is it Beelz-chan" said Endless Sorcerer Battler.

"Today is my birthday" said Beelzebub.

"Really? How can you tell? It's not like time is regular in the Meta-World?" asked Battler. He was suspicious of course. A decent Sorcerer must be able to keep his furniture in line after all.

"It is indeed Beelzebub's birthday" confirmed Ronove. He appeared happily and with no warning, as usual.

"You see Battler-sama. It's my birthday"

"Okay okay. Now then, what would my cute little ass nee-chan want? Probably food?" suggested Battler. He was already conjuring up different dishes, but was stopped by the blonde-haired demon stake.

"NO. Your food is icky Battler-sama" pouted Beelzebub.

Battler felt as though he could understand Beato's problem with making chocolates herself. Battler was a competent chef when using human methods, but when he conjured food using magic, it was so terrible, that not even Beelzebub, known for her insatiable appetite, refused to eat anything he made. He was going to have to ask how Ronove made such magnificent cookies later.

"Okay then, want Ronove to-" started Battler, but was cut off by Beelzebub.

"Geez, Battler-sama, don't you understand a woman's heart. Ronove's food is delicious, but he's furniture on duty, so his food wouldn't be good for a once-in-a-lifetime-birthday celebration"

Battler was going to argue that birthdays come and go, especially if you're a millennia-old demon stake, but quickly understood that the emotional aspect of a gift was more important to girls.

"Well then, what do you want?" asked Battler again.

"Gohda" said Beelzebub with a suspicious smirk, tongue licking her lips.

Toushiro Gohda was a man not used to change. After the murders, Gohda couldn't deny the witch and surrendered. Now, he had no control over the gameboard and could only watch and feel as his Piece was killed in various ways. Granted though, he supposed things could be worse. At least the cute demon nee-chan with the curls was always kind and respectable to him.

Gohda was also surprised when he found himself in a large, magnificent kitchen, one that was often used by that demon butler, Ronove. There was also Battler, with Kinzo's royal black cape draped around his shoulders, and the curly, blonde-haired nee-chan.

"There, I revived him for you; don't kill him, because I know from personal experience that it's a pain being brought back to life" said Battler, a little irritated by Beelzebub's hyperactivity.

"Thank you so much Battler-sama!!!" said Beelzebub, hugging Battler's arm. She turned to Gohda "Toushiro-kun, today's my birthday and I want you to make me all sorts of yummy things"

Ordinarily, Gohda would be happy to cook for a young girl with obviously good taste. However, he had a grave, solemn face. Beelzebub had committed a sin.

"Young girl, as a chef worth my sauce, I cannot cook for you"

You see, whether they be magical demon stakes or human servants, there is an eternal bond of love, trust, and battle between chefs and gourmets. This is natural as gourmets exist to eat until the chef loses will to cook, and chefs exist to satisfy and break gourmets. They are the ultimate enemies, as well as the greatest of allies. It goes without saying that each holds a reverent respect for the other. Beelzebub's sin was forgetting that respect.

"For disrespecting this Gohda, I cannot acknowledge you as my opponent!" yelled Gohda, his large physique being emphasized.

Beelzebub was distraught. She knew she should've acknowledged Gohda with the sacred chef-gourmet respect, but in her excitement over her birthday, she had broken a dangerous rule.

"WWAGHGHGH!!!" cried Beelzebub, tears streaming down her face. She quickly cleaned her face and faced Gohda, her face now resolute. "_Then I will make you cook for me!!!_"

Instead of the magical purple locus blade used by mid-to-advance level furniture, Beelzebub was using different weapons. This was not a battle between a human and furniture; it was between a gourmet and a chef. It was only natural that the proper weapons should be utilized…especially for one who had broken the rules.

"Bring it on, Toushiro-kun" said Beelzebub, now wielding a fork the size of a sword, and a spoon the size of a shield.

"**I am no longer Toushiro Gohda" **said Gohda, red words flying through the air. Everyone inside was surprised. After all, only magical beings should be able to use the red, right?

Magical power soon started flowing out of Gohda. As if time was running backwards, Gohda started becoming younger and skinnier. His combed back, dark-green and black hair was long and untamed. His blazer was flapping in an unidentified wind, changing into a sleek, black mantle. Battler was surprised at this sudden transformation; it's as if Gohda was bishounen-fied.

"**I am Magical Gohda Chef.** _I am undefeatable in the kitchen!!!"_ yelled the new magical Gohda, red and blue letters flying through the air and a glowing kitchen knife appeared in one hand, and a massive, club-like whisk in the other.

You see, the previous games had Gohda being killed as a human servant by demonic, magical creatures. This however, was a ritualistic battle between a chef and a gourmet.

Gohda and Beelzebub clashed, their powers attempting to dominate each other and neither one giving an inch.

Gohda pulled back and raised his kitchen knife, as golden butterflies started flying around him.

"**Take this, the appetizer crepes made by my hands to start the meal. Let it be known that I personally layered each one to have perfect consistency**" stated Gohda. The butterflies changed into countless crepes and started flying at Beelzebub.

"**Appetizers are a dime a dozen, I don't need to even acknowledge them"** Beelzebub used her large spoon as a shield. It released a large shockwave which sent the crepes flying and splattering the walls with soft, white cream.

"_That's no good, Toushiro-kun! Now, take this, the never ending appetite of a witch's gourmet"_ yelled Beelzebub as she stabbed the air with her fork.

Almost as if tearing a hole in reality, all foodstuffs were sucked into the hole. Gohda was shocked that such a young girl could use such a powerful technique. He swirled his whisk around and sent a variety of food from different culture, countries, and worlds, but nothing could sate it.

Then, the hole stopped sucking in food. It grew large, massive with power, and released all the power back upon poor Gohda, throwing him across the kitchen and seemingly reverting him to human form. Beelzebub flew over to Gohda and looked down on him.

"_Hee hee, looks like I win Toushiro-kun_"

"**I must admit, you are indeed an extremely powerful opponent, a gourmet even amongst the strongest of gluttons I've seen, and that is quite a large number. However, don't think I've lost yet!**" Then, Gohda blew up into sugar; it was the rare sugar clone technique, one thought to be forgotten.

Beelzebub immediately saw a gargantuan shadow underneath her feet. She looked up and saw Magical Gohda Chef, lacking his knife and whisk, but now with a golden spatula, his ultimate weapon from when he defeated the Golden Chef and took his title.

"**I was a fool to think appetizers could stop you. NOW YOU'LL SEE MY ULTIMATE POWER. DESSERT STYLE: CAAAAAAAKE!!!"** cried out Gohda, and indeed, on the golden spatula, was a delicious, triple-layered cake primed with tasteful whipped cream and with artistic strawberries on top.

"**Amazing Toushiro-kun, but I haven't shown you anything yet! GOLDEN GOURMET STYLE: ABSOLUTE PLATEEEEEEE**" Beelzebub had also thrown away her spoon and fork, and having summoned a large, golden plate with an extremely reflective surface. If Gohda couldn't break through her defenses, he would be blasted with his own attack and certainly lose.

"**You're quite amazing yourself, little girl. You are the most powerful opponent I have ever fought; I'm going to use every ounce of my power! GOLDEN CHEF STYLE: UPGRADE CAKE TO ICE-CREAM CAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!!!!!!!!"**

The two collided, neither showing any signs of letting up. Until, the golden plate frosted over, and was destroyed. The force sent Beelzebub flying high into the air, and she was caught by Gohda.

"**It seems I win, little girl**" said Gohda. Immediately, a bright light enveloped the kitchen. Once the light cleared, Battler was stupefied from the entire ordeal, though Beelzebub and Gohda didn't seem to care.

"Alright, I apologize, will you please cook for my birthday, Gohda-san?" asked Beelzebub, politely.

"It would be an honor to cook for such a pretty, young girl" said Gohda, a beaming smile on his face.

"Yay, thank you very much, Gohda-san!!!" said Beelzebub.

After many foods and different preparations, the day was ending, and both Gohda and Beelzebub were quite tired, especially after their duel.

"Aww, looks like I have to go, Gohda-san. Thank you again for cooking for my birthday!!! Here you go!!!" Beelzebub had forced a small box into Gohda's hands. He was quite surprised, after all, isn't it the birthday girl who receives presents from her guests.

Beelzebub immediately popped into golden butterflies and reappeared where Battler was waiting.

"So, what did you give him?" asked a curious Battler.

"Ihihihihihi, Toushiro-kun will be all mine…" said Beelzebub, a dark smile on her face.

Gohda opened the box and almost dropped it when he saw an engagement ring, along with a note.

"**I LOOVE YOUUU, GOHDA-KUUN!!!"**

Indeed, this was a demon birthday to remember. A large battle was quite unorthodox, but quite a spectacle for human and demon chefs and gourmets. Still, those close to the two fighters understood everything. Battler had to agree with Lucifer and the others

What a self-interested girl…


End file.
